Upping Joy

13. My mom was visiting, and I took her out for a glorious dinner.  Delicious Italian food at Lococo’s, with giant portions and excellent tiramisu.  And, you know, time with my wonderful mom.
14. My family and I went to Kabuki in San Francisco.  Kabuki is a Japanese style bathhouse with a steam room, sauna, hot bath, and a cold bath, plus tea, lemon and cucumber water, and a wonderful atmosphere.  It was relaxing, beautifying, and very soothing.
15. One the last day of my mom’s visit we had a great lunch at Flacos, a vegan Mexican restaurant, then swung by Sweet Adeliene’s for coffee/chai and baked goods, and finally took a walk around Rockridge and Elmwood.  Yo, East Bay?  I love you.  And I love my mom.
16. On a beautiful California day I bought myself a danish and a coffee and walked around, and remembered why I live here.
17. I got a massage!  It was so refreshing and beautiful.
18. After said massage, instead of rushing around all crazy, I took my time, stopped at the library for some new reads, picked up farmer’s market goodies, and relaxed.  No stressing post-massage.

Exploring Joy

8. One of the interesting things about making these lists is that it becomes clear what areas of my life I’m putting time into.  Lately, “joy” has been a bit neglected.  Don’t get me wrong, I do things that I enjoy.  But the way I defined joy for this project, well, I haven’t been giving as much to that.
Then today a friend called me up and invited me to a free community hot tub.  This is one of the best things about the East Bay: there are hidden corners of magic and beauty.  This afternoon my friend and I soaked in a large wooden hot tub outdoors, surrounded by a huge, tranquil yard of giant old trees and native plants growing wildly.  From the outside, the gate to this place looks like any other on the modest residential street.  Behind it, it was like my childhood images of what a secret garden would be.  Except with a hot tub, a hammock, and random soaking hippies.  It was so calming.  I felt alive and at peace, dipping into the water, then lying out to dry in the sun with roots and grasses all around me.  It was exactly what I needed: a little magic, a little joy.

9. FINALLY visited Bakesale Betty where the brownies are so good you’re moaning with delight midway through the first bite.  These are some of the best brownies I’ve ever eaten, and I have consumed a great number of brownies in my time.

10. One of the great joys in life is the library.  I particularly love reading magazines in squishy library chairs.  So I did just that when I needed a break.  I sat down, read a magazine, and relaxed.

11. I went to A’Cuppa Tea.  I have weird reactions to coffee which limits my ability to drink it, but tea I can have all the time.  I love tea passionately, and I heart teahouses.  A Cuppa Tea has an overwhelming selection, and I hope to sample it all.

12. A local spa is having a sale and I bought me a massage.

Further experiments in joy

4. I bought and lit a candle and enjoyed a candlelit evening in my lovely, and semi-furnished, apartment.
5. The Bay Area has this weird magical manifesting energy.  My friend Rain pointed this out to me.  In other places, people might announce, “I want more trapeze arts,” or “I want a job as an activist, “ or “I want a partner who’s passionate, full of life, and brilliantly creative,” and then go back to their day.  Maybe they look really hard or start things but it takes awhile, and often doesn’t quite fit their requirements.  Here, I personally know people who wanted more aerials and within two years of committing to it, the number of aerial schools doubled.  My sister is a professional activist only a year and a half out of college, when she moved here for an unpaid internship.  And the partner thing, well, it’s freaky how that’s come together for people.  So what do I want to do with this magical manifesting energy?  I want to become the person I hope to be.  So I wrote down 100 qualities (I’m obsessed with that number I guess) I want to have in a cool journal I’m making.  I’m happy about that.
6. I took a little walk around my neighborhood.  More accurately, I walked a different way to a nearby and familiar place.  In turning a different way, I found a café I’d never noticed before, a nursery, flyers offering intriguing events, and revisited some places I’d seen months before when visiting the Bay Area.  Most importantly, I walked through a beautiful, enchanted neighborhood, perfect for walking, and it brightened my whole mindset.
7. When my internet still wasn’t working, so I went to a cute café for their wi-fi.  It’s a funky place I found on my walk the other day,  all murals on the walls and hole-in-the-wallness.  Much nicer than going some place chic and full of college students and pretentious folks.  And good muffins.

Joy 101

Joy is distinct from pleasure in one important way: satisfaction.  I want to be clear on that with this section.  An activity in the “joy” category is something I delight in that is also satisfying.  Because while watching a “What Not To Wear” marathon or eating half a box of Girl Scout cookies is pleasurable, it’s very rarely satisfying.  Afterward I feel lazy and/or gross.  Joyful activities on the other hand are great during and after.  They’re special, celebrations, things I look back on and smile about.  Clear, yeah?  Okay, it’s a struggle in practice, but I find it worthwhile to think about.  Here are my joyous adventures so far:

1. My first day back in the States while staying in a hotel I ordered room service.  Indulgent and delicious.  I got to eat in bed while watching a movie.  It made re-enter to the country a little more fun.
2. My sis and I got manipedis and it was fabulous.  My nails looked great for well over a week and my toes are still gorgeous.

1. I bought Mos Def’s “The New Danger.” Listening to Mos Def and/or Talib Kweli makes me feel like I’m 18 again in the best possible way.  Some people weren’t so fond of “The New Danger” compared to his perfection in Blackstar and on “Black On Both Sides.”  But “Sex, Love, & Money” and “Close Edge” are worth the whole album alone in my humble opinion.  I love getting to know every song and turning them over in my mind, letting the album unfold for me.